5 Ocak 2026

mentally ill and cannot chill

nlybyrm

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Günlük Tavsiye-Öneri Yabancı Dil Psikoloji

In another glorious insomniac night that I must endure, my restless soul stumbled upon my shitty state of mind. Happiness is a state of mind. Why can’t feeling miserable and wretched be? So that leads us to this day, a mentally and emotionally disabled trip to my brain. Don’t get your hopes up. Because I’m about to hit those Heidi vibes at rock bottom.

Years ago, when I was scrolling down on Tumblr, I saw a post. And I saved it to my OneNote account. Now, almost more than a decade later, I am here to scratch some of your thoughts with the upcoming harsh truth. Okay, let's get started.

If I may explain the post to you, in some period of your lifetime, you may have encountered anxiety or depression. Or maybe both, if you’re lucky (!). And some dumb fudge cake may tell you, “You can’t let your mental health affect everything.” And before the ignorance that person contains keeps killing their brain cells on a daily basis, you stare at them and just say, “Sure, Jan.”

But in the very deep of our thoughts we are just eager to say that – in a very passive-aggressive voice – ‘’. Sorry. My bad. I think I may have forgotten that even though my mental is In My Brain, which does EvErYthiNg for me. Sooooooo, that is absolutely not an excuse for my mental health affecting everything I do.

Yes, I know. These people are actually in an existing state with the rest of us. Even you may be one of them. Lucky you, now you know that you’re one hell of a fudge cake!

And on the other hand, I still don’t know how to uninstall my anxiety and my depression and my bipolar disorder and my panic attacks, BUT! From here on we are trying to survive this storm inside our heads and keep on our lively (!) existence. I must admit that I can’t help but admire someone who’s been through a storm and a demanding son of a fudge cake and is still able to shine. That’s pure survivor material. By all means, I am not saying you have to skyrocket your mood chart and walk around like you’re a stunt on ‘’Smile’’. All I am trying to canalise through my tainted heart is that you don’t need to reach anyone’s standard to prove that you’re in pain. I know, most of the time that standard we think we must reach is when finally our problem is bad enough to affect them. Sometimes it’s easier to blame yourself than to admit that someone you care about has the capacity to continuously let you down.

I am asking myself, “Why are you like this?” every damn day, and all I know is, all I’m obligated to tell you is that:

Depression isn’t pretty. But having depression doesn’t make you ugly.

Anxiety is a burden. But having anxiety doesn’t make you a burden.

You aren’t your problems. You deserve respect and patience.

Don’t let bastards get you down.

Love, always
-Nilay Bayram